missing you.

Abraham and I at KidzCare

This week has been somewhat challenging. I am finding it hard to once again find my place in the group. K and K left at the beginning of the week-which are two of the three girls I work with and spend pretty much every waking moment with. It is difficult to fit in with the others that I don’t get much time with or have not yet connected with to some degree. Yet, I think these emotions I am feeling are partially because for the first time I got to FINALLY got to Skype with my mom and three of my brothers-it has not worked up to this point. It was both nice and sad to talk to them. It made me realize how much I miss them, which made me feel a pinch of homesick. But, I know as much as I miss them, and everyone else at home, I love it here and wouldn’t come home if I had the opportunity.

Looking good!

On my walk this morning C and I were discussing life, including marriage and just how the view of marriage has changed over the years. So often I think we get married young, and unfortunately a lot of these marriages end in divorce. Marriage has always been something that scares me, not because I don’t want to get married, but because I don’t want the option of divorce.  In Tanzania it is not necessarily acceptable but is common for the wife or husband to have a boyfriend or girlfriend outside of the marriage. How is that right? No wonder Aids is spreading throughout Africa. But I also have brought this topic up with a few Tanzanians and for the most part they believe that when you get married you should stay with that one person. I was discussing this with a young man and he said he wants to wait to get married (to a white girl) and have a house and education before stepping into marriage-he feels as if he needs to have this things in order before he has a wife-which in my opinion is very wise. He also understood the spread of HIV and how it is spreading rapidly.

It is comforting to know that the awareness of Aids is spreading, but it is also unfortunate and sad for those who have it and can’t do anything about it. There are a few kids at the both of the orphanages that I work at with HIV and it breaks my heart knowing that this is something that they will suffer from. Their legs are scabbing with wounds, and their eyes are a tint of yellow. I don’t like to think about it, but when I do my heart breaks even harder.

priceless.

Amongst all of this corruption and the things that break my heart, the children still gleam with so much life. It makes it easier to look past anything, and just embrace them. 

Shakira, so cute.